goodbye to you

rainbows in her pocket by pinkytoast

so i decided to let my biggest vice go... no more ciggys.  just so you all know this wasn't easy and surprised myself more than those of you who know me. i am doing this with the support of chantix and of course aLot of patience, understanding and encouragement from the mr. But in my head this is sort of how it's going;

you are what?!

well how bout just one more?

you're going to miss it.

it's going to be too hard!

what about when you have coffee?

in the car? 

out with friends? 

well, for the first week i fought it. I took the little pill and still smoked as usual. But each day and each cig i lit taste worse and my body was fighting it more. i thought about it only in the moments of habit. like when i'm in the car. but the smell bugs me now. i haven't smoked in my car lately but i still smell it. weird.

side effects ~  (very) vivid dreams and (very) nauseous.

it is week 2. and it's been 48 hours since i have had any nicotine. and it's all about one day at a time right now. long term success is to be determined. 

28 of my favorites

1. listening to pandora

2. fields of wildflowers

3. letterpress printing

4. snuggling with my pups

5. caribou's white chocolate mocha

6. vibrant colors

7. swedish fish candy

8. sabrina ward harrison's artwork

9. playing board games

10. being barefoot

11. urban decay's eye makeup

12. fairies

13. hugs and kisses
14. sleeping to dream

15. casino trips with mama

16. dad's homemade pizza

17. movie trailers

18. polaroid cameras

19. journaling

20. twilight series ~ vampires

21. blog surfing

22. owls

23. little monsters
24. when alex reads to me
25. peacock feathers
26. thunderstorms
27. sudoku
28. free people clothing

a classic

Sabrina Ward Harrison

My favorite artist! She inspires me to the bone. Has a new line of fabulous pieces over at Papya; another favorite of mine. I can't wait to put my order in and get my hands all over her new works. Pure amazing, brilliance! 

i ♥ the uglys

how can you not?

words i would have said

stop! don't - please - heal, love, respect. trust. let go of fear and anger. forgive no matter how much it hurts because forgiveness heals. resentments hurt and destroy. cry when you need to. i know you're scared but trust the ones who love you, lean on us, take time and pray, pray, pray. because life is so fragile and we only get this one time. one chance. don't turn your head - don't run and bury - it aLL comes up and out at some point. face your truth now. it will be okay. it will make you stronger. you are not alone. you will find yourself in all of this . . . believe.

Johnny Cash gets comfy

so it was one of those nights where boredom gets the best of you. i was playing with my video setting  on my camera ~ with no intention of ever showing this to anyone ~ but i guess, what the hell. enjoy?!

journals

one of my passions in life is to journal. in these journals i write to be free, to be lost and to be found. i draw and scribble and collage. they are who i am. very personal and true. some for sharing and some are private. but i also really enjoy making journals for others. maybe because i wish for everyone to have a place to call their own. a place for dreams, an escape, a healing ground.

Up!

Where the Wild Things Are

One of my favorite books is coming to the big screen!! Go here to watch the trailer.

infatuation

okay i watched Twilight last night and WoW ~ what a good movie for a girl like me who loves romance and vampires! I highly suggest it to you. And Robert Pattison. . . yuM. Now I'm hooked and have to read the books as well, where as I never understood what all the hype was about.

introducing mr. cash

this is Johnny Cash

we welcomed him into our home, march 4th at 12 weeks old.

we adopted him from a wonderful couple who run Pet Project Rescue.

he is adjusting really well and loves his brother Jaxson.

we are now the proud parents of two lil adopted pups :)

27 things to do before i turn 28

art panel print by papya

1. teach an art class

2. set up an etsy page

3. take more pictures

4. go strawberry picking

5. make yoga a priority

6. finish paintings for the basement

7. take Alex to Fawn Doe Rosa

8. work on my book

9. create a planner

10. plant flowers in the backyard

11. walk the beach barefoot

12. get a new tattoo

13. take an art class

14. color outside the lines

15. dance with girlfriends

16. practice meditation

17. buy a hammock

18. take a road trip

19. spend an afternoon reading

20. shop the farmers market

21. complete the ninth step

22. bake more

23. practice my guitar

24. laugh until I cry

25. finish Style Statement

26. watch sunsets

27. continue to spiritually grow

i pledge to live wholehearted

Brene Brown is amazing. Her words spoke directly to my soul. How true it is that we are some how connected and that we need to live with our whole heart. I am amazed by this woman. Check her out! 

you tube video

dogs dream too. . .

monday monday

This shirt is so fitting to my mood today.

mayhem

The economy in a frenzy, yeah yeah and we've all been effected. 

But I can feel change brewing.

The calm before the storm.

Maybe a little positive thinking...

Turn off the damn depressing news!

Turn on the radio loud and dance, dance, dance!!!

~ Don't stop living the dream ~

LiVe NoW!

lil lamb

Peach Pie Planner

Love, love, love this! I just purchased this today :) made by Jetoy. Which I discovered on Anahata Katkin's site (who is one of my favorite artists) . I am obsessed with planners! The whole idea of being organized. I love that you get to fill in the dates and that all the pages are covered in amazing art. So excited to play in this. Make sure to check out the other great designs and products from both sites!!

haunted

old ghosts walk through my dream space. shaking my core. pulling at my strings. unraveling me little by little. i wake in tears, trembling.

the boxes fell, spilling open all over the floor.

as i heard her tell her story, i saw my own.
damn boxes, i should have never kept them anyways. but see, i tend to keep everything in boxes. store all the old memories, moments and faces. and i thought these boxes were sealed. and just like that, there it all was. exposed and present.

do we ever entirely let go of anything?

Step 9

Made direct amends to such people wherever possible,

except when to do so would injure them or others.

Admitting my wrongs, taking responsibility for my actions.
A way to finally stop carrying shame, guilt and wreckage.
feeling FEAR and RESISTANCE
but not for their approval or even their acceptance.
the Do so in a way that does not cause harm to others.
How is this possible?! They wouldn't be wrongs to admit and take responsibility for then.
Of course my actions hurt others!
I 've always carried these doings around as self punishment, to shield others from the pain. to protect and prevent.
I know how bad it has hurt myself, then why hurt another?
Rather carry the burden, keep the pain to myself, locked in.
And how do you know if someone you have hurt even wants to hear from you
or relive the past with you?
Is it FEAR that holds me back or is it respect for others feelings?
The except of this step is the RESISTANCE.

revealing

"i strive for balance,

truth and understanding

to align with my truest self and spirit.

I abandon fearful rigidity to allow

creative, joyful potentials to emerge"

handful of hearts

So in an exploration the other day i found these on Rae Dunn's Blog. She is an amazing talent! And what a fun gift for Valentines. Although, i do believe i would appreciate these way more then he would. 

simple, true, small treasure to hold in the palm of your hand. 

check me out!

Look at these! My work photographed and posted on a bLog! This is a first :) Thanks to the fabulous crew at Pulp Fashion! I am so looking forward to teaching a class there and making more of these fun books.

just do it

oh me, oh my, can't believe i am finally going to attempt to keep a blog! i am on my way out of the myspace/facebook world. transitioning everything to here. a space where i can ramble my thoughts. share fun finds. let you take a peak inside. what exists. all the quarks and sparkle. ready or not here i come.