goodbye to you

rainbows in her pocket by pinkytoast

so i decided to let my biggest vice go... no more ciggys.  just so you all know this wasn't easy and surprised myself more than those of you who know me. i am doing this with the support of chantix and of course aLot of patience, understanding and encouragement from the mr. But in my head this is sort of how it's going;

you are what?!

well how bout just one more?

you're going to miss it.

it's going to be too hard!

what about when you have coffee?

in the car? 

out with friends? 

well, for the first week i fought it. I took the little pill and still smoked as usual. But each day and each cig i lit taste worse and my body was fighting it more. i thought about it only in the moments of habit. like when i'm in the car. but the smell bugs me now. i haven't smoked in my car lately but i still smell it. weird.

side effects ~  (very) vivid dreams and (very) nauseous.

it is week 2. and it's been 48 hours since i have had any nicotine. and it's all about one day at a time right now. long term success is to be determined.